April 6, 2012: 2 months down.
As of today, we are 2 months in IBESR. I’ve been waiting for this 2 month day… so that I can wait 1 more month and on the 3 month day, email our agency to see if they’ve heard anything. How silly.
I’ve been all sorts of in a bit of a funk today….. embarrassed as I am to say, I really am truly wanting a miracle… and I somehow really thought maybe by the 2 month, we’d find out that we just got through to the presidents desk to sign for dispensation (I know, another 6-8 months? Wait).. but I secretly had hopes of a miracle. HA. So yea, my mind was all annoyed, impatient, struggling today. We’ve not been able to skype w/ verlande for about a month—we have had short glimpses of her over skype, but the connection has been bad since Haiti had the earthquake 4 weeks ago. So I really miss her, and I’m frankly impatient. I had been working on my patience, then this past month I admit that I got on this roll where I decided “patience is overrated”…. And really believed it… Ihave been trying to be “obedient” to waiting for God’s time for the past 18 months… I’ve been trying to learn this skill that I truly am horrible at—horrible at patience, always have been…
For some reason, this past month, I decided I needed to stop focusing on patience… that it was okay to become impatient again. I’m not sure why.
Then today… I don’t know why it hit me.. but I realized how SILLY my thoughts have really been. I coach people running marathons and triathlons—what do I ALWAYS tell my marathoners (and myself)—do not EVER even mentally consider the first 10 miles of a marathon! HOW SILLY.. can you IMAGINE?? How depressing—you’re at mile 2, great, 24.2 left! ABSURD!!! So WHY am I thinking of this 2 month time today.. !!!!!! We truly are still at the time that I can’t even THINK about time!!! My first 10 miles is really getting to the presidents desk… mile 10-18 will be getting dispensation/getting it printed (maybe 10-20 actually)… then 20-24 miles will be Parquet/ MOI/ mile 24-26 is VISA/PASSPORT!!! And the .2 is the airport /customs, etc!!!! I honestly think I can work so much better putting it in these terms. So I need to let it go. We hope to skype w/ Verlande on Sunday... we'll try again.
Oh Dear Verlande, we love you and pray you are staying strong.
